My love often times are like roses
Beautiful, intimate, flawless
But it dies with time
Wrinkling, wilting, drying
Until it’s stale and fragile
And eventually it’s crushed
Beneath an accidental step
But even in its demise
I shall remember you
And when your roses turn to daisies
I hope you remember me too
My love often times are like roses
The night creeps in my window pane
Every shadow disappears
Except for yours, in the spot where you used to lay
I still think about you from time to time
But you’re so far from thinking of me
I’m pathetic, washed up, a loser
With no sense of direction
A cracked, empty shell of a man
And no light seeps through the splits
For this tunnel is a dead end
I won’t know when it comes
But when it does, god will it be beautiful
How do you forgive the unforgivable?
It seems impossible, but perfectly probable
It runs laps through your mind all the time,
Every day and every night
Constantly filling you with with white hot rage and fright
But this negativity causes you to to things you regret
Things you plead, hope and trust you could forget
This is a world that lives to forget
Mowing through alcohol and cigarettes
Only to remember what they hope and pray to forget
And what’s on a page long checklist the governments set
But in order to forget,
You must first forgive.
I find solace in your tracks,
The way your free spirited hair found it’s way to hug my fingertips
The way your soft untouched lips caressed mine with subtle ambition.
I remember the day we met so clearly,
it was a cold February 11th evening,
I had just gotten done with my report when I saw you.
I had never been one to talk to girls, but
I was feeling confident.
I said hi and your ocean-hue eyes drowned me.
We talked for hours next to the lilacs by the window in the library.
I often times find myself reading your old letters to me, asking myself “why did you see what you had.”
Why didn’t I this, why didn’t I that, it seems every memory of you is clouded with regret of my own actions.
But that’s all you are anymore, is a collection of memories.
Pain demands to be felt, it takes no mercy on the wounded, whether the lacerations be on your skin or your heart, figurative, literally tearing you apart.
It reminds you day and night of what could be, rereading your chapter looking for a loophole or an answer, instead of moving onto the next.
I can still remember the phone ringing at 2:15pm that Sunday afternoon.
We had been in a big argument, and you wouldn’t call me back.
But then you did.. So I thought.
I answered swiftly to find a familiar voice, but not yours.
"Hello, ma’am," I greeted your mothers voice.
She was horrified, and broke the news,
And to this day, i visit you every year on February 11th, and bring you lilacs.
they always were your favorite.
I’m sorry I didn’t give ever undying second to you, because that’s what you deserved.
But it’s too late now.
I never got to apologize.
I never even got to say goodbye.
I just hope you’re happier in your new home now.
You’ve probably forgotten me, but i haven’t forgotten you.
Time ticks on, yet I feel still
The winds and fates are in motion
Persons finding themselves everywhere
As if our existence has a greater meaning than just to
But I, I feel on pause,
as if tomorrow brings change
Branding it on my forehead like I was advertisement for a more productive, happier time
But days roll on and tomorrow never rears it’s head,
One pace ahead
You’re wasting your days with me
You have all the galaxies of the universe locked behind the membranes covering your eyes
Nebulas of blue and green against the frosty outer rim
While I have nothing but cold emptiness filling every void where matter is needed
You have honey and love running through your veins that leave me lovestruck in every sense of phrase
While I have mud and dirt filling my insides, trailing down, I am the epitome of useless
You have wavy beautiful thick hair in which the winds blow through, reminding me of the winds sirens through the savannahs tall grass in Africa
While I have bent, damaged sticks of melanin running off my head carelessly like the frays off a hole on worn jeans
You are the magnificent sun, a burning hot ball of fire, bringing life and hope to all, blinding anyone who dare look at your beauty
While I am the moon, stealing your grandeur for my own. Bouncing your awe-inspiring energy off of my cold, dead, useless surface.
You are everything
While I am nothing
And I live in dire fear of the day you have an epiphany
And realize this undying truth
To leave me stranded without a place in your heart
That I can call home.